Tony Robbins - What they dont teach you about FEAR

PURE DELTA WAVES: Sleep Meditation (Track: Cosmic Delta Waves)

Jim Rohn - Learn This Skill or Live a Mediocre Life

How To Instantly Slip Into A Zen Like State

One of my greatest success weapons is meditation.

Meditation has so many incredible health benefits… it can instantly bring about sharper focus, a stress-free mind, deeper contentment, emotional balance, lowered blood pressure… the list goes on!

But oftentimes it can be difficult to really reach that sweet spot.

You know what I’m talking about…

The never-ending mind chatter, the inability to disconnect…

We’ve all experienced it!

And this is why, these days, I like to use to a secret weapon that allows me to instantly slip into a deep, zen-like meditative state.

You see, meditations laced with advanced binaural beats and other advanced sound technologies, allow you to reach the ultimate meditative state almost instantly… removing ALL of the hard work!

And today, my good friends at the leading meditation lab, SubSines, would like to give you one of their powerful meditations for FREE!

Click here to access your Free Zen-Meditation Download right now.

-> What's so good about it?

Well, this particular audio was created in one of the best recording studios in Europe, by world-renowned recording artist Lennart Krarup.

Lenny has more than 25 years experience in sound sculpting and producing… He has several gold records to his name, and sometimes he passes his time conducting orchestras in Hollywood!

He’s at such an elite level that people pay a LOT of money to have him produce their musical ideas... so I personally know for a fact that this mediation audio will be one of the best downloads you’ve accessed all year!

I know that is a bold statement but I cannot speak highly enough of Lenny and his expert meditation partner, Joanne.

So if you're open to the idea of changing your life for the better, in a scientifically proven and holistic way, click here right now:

Even if you're not into meditation but would like to know what it feels like to be completely stress-free, relaxed and present in your life, then this is your lucky day.

Tony Robbins - 30 years of stuttering, cured in 7 minutes!

25 Common Dream Symbols For Women and What They Mean: Flying, Abortion, and Orgasms

Is anything better than pop psychology? Not in my shady-online-university textbook. Dream interpretation is one of the best ways to dabble in amateur Jungian theory (not to mention potentially understand your own mind better).

Here are some of the most common dream symbols, some of which are especially relevant to women. Get your metaphorical couch out: you’re gonna to need to lie down for this.

Teeth

Here’s a rundown of teeth dreams, according to the ‘definitive’ dream symbol site Dream Moods:

Teeth Falling Out: “Signifies a lack of self-confidence and embarrassment. You are afraid that others will know of your short-comings. If you acted calmly in your dream, then it may point to how can make the best out of any situation.”

Teeth Rotting/Decaying: ”You may have said something that you shouldn’t have. You may have uttered some false or foul words and those words are coming back to haunt you.”

Nice, Sparkly Teeth: “Fulfilled Wishes, Happiness.” Julia Roberts-ness.

Hair

“To see hair in your dream signifies sexual virility, seduction, sensuality, vanity, and health,” Dream Moods coos. “If your hair is knotted or tangled, then it is symbolic of uncertainty and confusion in your life.”

Cutting Hair: “Loss of strength” (Samson, anyone?) or “you may be reshaping your thinking or ambitions and eliminating unwanted thoughts/habits.” Or, you just broke up with your boyfriend.

Bugs in Hair: “Something is weighing on your mind that you are confused about. Perhaps you are making a big deal out of a minor matter. Alternatively, the dream refers to concerns over your public image.”

Driving

Back in the day, we probably had nightmares about wolves. Now, we tend to have nightmares about car accidents. Makes sense, since that’s what’s most likely to kill us these days.

Dreams about driving are some of the most common, and here’s what they might mean, according to Dream Moods:

Trouble Steering/Seeing Road: Real shocker here: “you do not know where you are headed in life and what you really want to do with yourself.”

You’re The Passenger: “You are not in control of your life and following the goals of others instead of your own. If you are driving from the passenger side of a car, then it suggests that you are trying to gain control of the path that your life is taking.”

Driving Also = Sex: “Consider how you are driving and what kind of car you are driving and how it relates to your waking sex life. Or the dream may be a pun on your ‘drive’ or ambition.”
Subconscious be punny.

You’re Naked!

This one is obviously nothing to be ashamed of. Dream Moods breaks it down:

Naked and Mortified: “You may be hiding something and are afraid that others can see right through you… Such anxieties are elevated especially in situations where you are trying to impress others. Perhaps you are in a new work environment or in a new relationship.”

You’re Naked; No One Notices: So, you’re having an emperor’s-new-clothes-moment. This “implies that your fears are unfounded; no one will notice except you. You may be magnifying the situation and making an issue of nothing.”

Naked and Unashamed: “Symbolizes your unrestricted freedom. You have nothing to hide and are proud of who you are. The dream is about a new sense of honesty, openness, and a carefree nature.” Miley Cyrus haters be damned.

Flying

I’ve only had one flying dream in my life that I can remember, but man, was it awesome. According to Psychotherapist Jeffrey Sumber, flying dreams represent “freedom, momentum, or a lack thereof.”
Apparently, if I want more flying dreams, I might want to consider thinking like a man. In a sad comment on the state of women’s self esteem, Sumber says dudes believe they can fly more often.

“Often times, men in today’s world negotiate issues regarding freedom. There is great pressure to perform at work, at home, in the bedroom, financially, athletically, socially, and more and more, emotionally,”  Sumber mansplained to the Huffington Post. “Thus, it has become fairly common for many males to confront their feelings about this pressure as well as their relationship to the underlying desire to be free, by working it out in flying dreams.”

Is he serious? We women negotiate all of those things! (And then some.) I’d pop-theorize it’s realizing we lack certain freedoms that keeps many of us women from flying as often as we should.

Sexy Sex Sex

Hopefully for you, your favorite wish fulfillment dream features sex — or at least the promise of it. So what does dreaming about sexy times mean, aside from the obvious?

“To dream about sex refers to the integration and merging of contrasting aspects of yourself. It represents psychological completion. You need to be more receptive and incorporate aspects of your dream sex partner into your own character,” Dream Moods advises. “Consider the nature of the love-making. Was it passionate? Was it slow? Was it wild? The sex act parallels aspects of yourself that you wish to express.”

Though, apparently, “a more direct interpretation of the dream may be your libido’s way of telling you that it has been too long since you have had sex.”

Oral Sex: Not surprisingly, oral sex is all about a “willingness to give or receive pleasure/joy. It is symbolic of your creative energy and reaffirms that you are headed in the right direction in life.” (Tell us something Beyoncé doesn’t already know.)

Orgasms: According to Dream Moods, the big-o ”represents an exciting end to something. What have you just completed in your life?”

“Alternatively, the dream means that you are not getting enough sex. You need to relieve some of your sexual tensions.” Yup, just like guys and wet dreams, it’s gotta come out some way. We suggest being conscious.

Hella Gay Sex

Obviously, it’s just like regular sex, except for many people, more complicated:

The I’m-Having-Gay Sex-But-I’m-Not-Gay (Wait, Am I?) Dream: “Represents a union with aspects of yourself. It is symbolic of self-love, self-acceptance, and compassion. If you are uncomfortable with homosexuality in your dream, then it suggests some fears or anxieties femininity [or] you may be experiencing some insecurity in your relations with the opposite sex.” Because maybe you’d like to have sex with them.

The Is My Man Gay? Dream: “Represents your anxieties and fears that he won’t like you back. By seeing him as gay, then it would be easier for you to dismiss your feelings for him because you have no chance with him. On a side note, it is common for expectant fathers to have dreams of homosexual encounters.” Totally normal guys.

The I’m-Gay-in-Real-Life-AND-Having-Gay-Sex Dream: “Simply a reflection of your own self.” Pop-psychology FTW.

And …You’re Pregnant

Whoops, you had so much dream sex that now you’re dream-pregnant.

You’re Pregnant and Happy: “Symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. Being pregnant in your dream may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal.”

Pregnant and Baby is Dying Inside You: Yikes, this is a thing? “To dream that you are pregnant with the baby dying inside of you suggests that a project you had put a lot of effort into is falling apart and slowly deteriorating. Nothing is working out the way you had anticipated.” Um, yeah, because there’s a friggin’ dream-baby dying in you.

Having an Abortion: “To dream that you have an abortion suggests that you are hindering and blocking your own growth. You may be hesitant in pursuing a new direction in your life due to fear, pressure, personal conflict or moral obligation.” Not at all problematic.

Dream Moods concedes that of course an abortion dream “may also be a reflection of your own real-life abortion and thus serves as a way of healing from the trauma and working towards self-acceptance.”

Having an Illegal Abortion: “You are desperate to keep things exactly the same. If the abortion results in death, then it means that your approach to a problem is all wrong.” Or, that you live in one of these states.

Marriage

First comes baby, then comes marriage. But according to Dream Moods, a marriage dream doesn’t necessarily mean you want to get hitched. Instead, it could mean you’re “undergoing an important developmental phase in your life. The dream may also represent the unification of formerly separate or opposite aspects of yourself. In particular, it is the union of masculine or feminine aspects of yourself.”

Oddly, Dream Moods adds that dreaming of a proposal “suggests that some situation will take a turn for the worse.” Probably your sex life.

Death

One favorite pop-psychology theory is that most people don’t tend to actually die in their dreams because it would mean suspending their ego. But apparently, plenty of people don’t have that issue with follow-through and totally attend their own funeral.

“To dream that you die in your dream symbolizes inner changes, transformation, self-discovery and positive development that is happening within you or your life. You are undergoing a transitional phase and are becoming more enlightened or spiritual. Although such a dream may bring about feelings of fear and anxiety, it is no cause for alarm as it is often considered a positive symbol.”

OK, now that will be $120.

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Brain Sync Brain Power Kelly Howell Brain Wave Therapy Subliminal Reprog...

Get Rid of Morning Anxiety with 10 Easy Positive Affirmations

“What is love? Love is the absence of judgement. ~Dalai Lama.”

Do you wake up with morning anxiety, feelings of stress and tension even before facing your day?
Did you know that when you first rouse out of sleep, you are your most vulnerable and most susceptible to worry and anxiety and stress?
And did you know that you can heal your morning anxiety quickly and easily with the right tool?
Millions of people experience morning anxiety of some level. On the surface, it may seem harmless.

But if you continue to ignore it, the anxiety will build up tension and stress in your system over the years and can adversely affect your health and mental well-being. Plus, getting rid of this anxiety is entirely within your control so why not do the few simple things to make yourself feel better every morning to greet the day?

Those first few moments as you are slowly waking up are critical to setting the tone of your day. You can take charge and decide how you are going to feel starting with that first moment. This is so easy to do that you do not need any special preparation for it and you don’t even need to be in a particular position. In fact, you can do this even as you are still laying in bed under the covers, noodling over the dreams you just had, and slowly coming to full consciousness.

This easy and effective path to getting rid of morning anxiety is the path of daily positive affirmations. It is a tool that you can use anytime, anywhere, to redirect your negative thoughts and create space for positive thoughts in your mind.

I used to be skeptical but I can honestly say that this truly works. But it just so happens that the power of the mind and the miracle of positive thoughts has also been proven by science to improve our health, productivity, creativity, longevity, and overall state of being.

Of course, the only thing that really matters is that you – not science or I – believe that positive affirmations are going to help you. By believing alone, you have taken the first step towards healing your morning anxiety.

Positive affirmations are simple, first-person, present-tense, active statements that you repeat to yourself on a regular basis. As a result, you create the exact state of mind that you wish to be in and for most of us, that’s a positive, healthy and productive state of mind.

You can create your own affirmations from scratch, use affirmations that resonate with you or modify affirmations that you like but don’t quite feel right to you. I am sharing 10 morning affirmations here that are particularly effective in helping you address morning anxiety.
1. I am feeling healthy and strong today.
2. I am loved, loving and lovable.
3. I have the courage to make this a great day.
4. My body is healing and improving every day.
5. Everything works out for my highest good.
6. I choose to see the best side of people and circumstances.
7. I make a positive difference for someone today.
8. Everything I need comes to me at the right time.
9. My work on earth has meaning and purpose.
10. I am grateful and content with my life.

How to best use these morning affirmations:

Read over them out loud a few times, familiarize yourself with the sound of your voice as you read positive statements. Some of us are not even used to hearing ourselves talk this way.

Then choose your favorite three affirmations from the list and put them on a note card or on your phone where you can quickly access it. Put the phone or note card next to your bed. When you wake up tomorrow, grab the affirmations while still in bed and say each one out loud to yourself three times.

Repeat this for a week. If you want to extend the experience, pick five to seven affirmations and repeat each three times every morning. You can also swap the first three for a set of new three after a week.

When you do this, your mind starts to get used to hearing a positive inner dialogue. As a result, you begin to push out the negative dialogue to the background and change the flow of your thoughts.
Then you create the habit of speaking affirmative thoughts and creating positive self-talk and soon, you will memorize the affirmations and know them by heart. Here’s a free audio sample for morning affirmations to get you started.

Over time, this is your ultimate tool to push anxiety out of the way, as you do the sheets to get out of bed, and wake up to face your day with positive thoughts and productive mind.
What do you think? Are you ready to let positive affirmations bring you peace of mind?

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Jim Rohn - Four Life Lessons

The First Step To Change

I would forgive you for reading a few personal development blog posts and coming away from the experience more troubled than relieved. After all, *Why don’t you own a business? *Isn’t it about time you traveled the world?

Those things will happen, of course — right after you sign up for the email list.
Phew. Thank God all I have to do to solve my problems is click a button.

In a perfect world, right? Actually, it’s not so far off

The most frustrating aspect of the you-don’t-just-click-a-button-to-solve-your-problems world is…the truth isn’t that different. Small changes in personal behavior do lead to big changes.

You hear it all the time because it’s true: the most challenging barriers to personal change are self-created. Humans have a fantastic capacity for internally-generated excuses inventing and assigning external blame. These excuses protect us from our fear of failure…by protecting us from failure…by protecting us from even trying in the first place.

It’s not even a “matter-of-fact-hey-this-can-happen” issue. Big changes cannot happen without small changes. The entire published works of Tolstoy could never exist without a rough draft first page, handwritten somewhere back in 19th-century-Russia.

Prove it to yourself

There wouldn’t happen to be any goals in your life that you’ve been meaning to do for a long time despite no recorded progress…would there? Big goals — like learning another language, or starting that business, or traveling the world or any of the other lofty aspirations we’d prefer to think impossible.

Well (if you do happen to have anything like that going on) here’s what you can do “rightnow” to make a start. Commit to one small personal change, do it everyday for one week, and write it down.

No ideas? Here are some good ones:

*Put your pants on left leg first
*Blink 3 times every time you walk into an elevator
*Take a 5-minute walk around the office every day at 3:17
Why??? At the end of one week, you will have undeniable formal proof of your personal capacity to change. Then you can think about more obviously-beneficial changes.
*Writing for 5 minutes a day gets you 15,000 words in a year; conservatively
*30 minutes a day practicing guitar & voice gets you 80 hours of practice in under 6 months, or enough practice to go from zero ability to competently singing along
*Studying a language 30 minutes a day for a month is more than enough time to learn the Russian alphabet
*That thing you’ve been meaning to start for a few years now

Of course, if you are struggling with personal change and would rather not take action, you still maintain the option of making excuses for yourself and rationalizing how impossible it would have been anyway.

Which choice do you prefer?

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Tony Robbins 5 Keys to Wealth & Happiness part 2

22 Of the best motivational videos online free

For the last week or so I have been scouring the internet for free personal development videos, one of them I showed you yesterday; Steve Jobs. Well I have finally managed to get 22 great videos from some great personal development speakers and inspirational figures. I could have spent weeks doing this as I watched videos until my eyes were square.

you will probably notice there is a lack of female speakers in this. This was not deliberate there were not a lot of female speakers out there, the ratio was about 20:1, that’s 20 men to every 1 woman. Not a good statistic.

Anyway I have spent all day putting this together and I am proud to present 22 of the best personal development and inspirational figures of today.

Bob Proctor – The Science of getting rich: 1 Hr 47 Mins

Deepak Chopra – The way of the Warrior: 1 Hr 8 mins

Jim Rohn – Your best year ever: 10 mins

Tony Robbins – Interview with Charlie Rose: 55 Mins

Oprah Winfrey – Interview with David Letterman, Part 1: 10 Mins

The Secret – The movie (with subtitles). 1 Hr 29 Mins

Nick Vujicic – Speech Preview: 24 mins

Malcolm Gladwell – Authors at TED Talks: 18 mins

Joe Vitale – Portable empire: 9 mins

James Arthur Ray – Live Presentations – 28 mins

Steve Jobs – Commencement Speech at Stanford: 14 mins

Mary Foley – AOL retiree at aged 33, turned Author and speaker: 6 Mins

Paul McKenna – Accelerated learning: 50 Mins

Ross Jeffries – Speed Seduction 1: 1hr 54 Mins

Brian Tracy – Sales mastery (part 1): 17 Mins

Les Brown – On Mastery TV: 44 Mins

Tim Ferriss – Authors at Google with Marci Alboher: 56 Mins

Michael Beckwith – Bridging heaven and earth show: 58 Mins

J K Rowling – Autobiography Part 1 of 5: 10 Mins

Jack Canfield – The success principles: 5 mins

Wayne Dyer – The power of Intentions: 2 Hrs 15 mins

Tony Buzan – Mind Mapping: 6 mins

If you have any videos you would like to share then leave a comment with the link and in a few months time I can hopefully make a top 50 list.

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4 Ways to Protect Yourself From Emotional Manipulation

“Anything is better than lies and deceit!”
―Leo Tolstoy

How could anyone fall for that?  How could I have been so foolish?  Why do they believe such lies?  How could we have been conned like that?

There are emotionally manipulative people of varying degrees all around us.  When we are young we like to think that we are immune to the psychological pressures that confuse, manipulate and condition other people.  We are not so gullible, are we?  But part of truly maturing as an individual involves understanding how you too are led by the environment, influenced by others, and driven by the needs you have as a human being.

Human beings can be manipulated precisely because we share innate psychological characteristics that render us ALL susceptible, to a point.  Although, like any other weakness, some people are naturally more prone to succumb, while others have higher levels of immunity to the external pressures that can make us do things we would normally never think of doing.

But assuming that we are already “immune” is naive and the surest path to being a victim of manipulation.  Let me give you a powerful example:

Emotionally Manipulated to Death

The day is November 18, 1978, and you’re in Guyana.  There you stand in the middle of Jonestown, a loyal member of Jim Jones’ cult known as “The People’s Temple”.  He commands you to drink a cup of poisonous, cyanide-laced Kool-Aid and take your own life.
What do you do?
Well of course you don’t do it, right?  Who is Jim Jones, or anyone for that matter, to tell you to end it all?  You are not a robot that can be ordered to kill yourself against your own will!  But an astounding 907 people simply followed his orders and died that fateful day.  And many of these people poisoned their children before they took their own lives.  People who wanted to live and wanted their children and spouses to live.
Why did these people do this?  Why did men and women, many college educated, allow themselves to be abused and brainwashed by this man?  Why did they agree to sell their homes and give all their possessions and money to “The People’s Temple” – an obvious cult?
Were these people of abnormally low intelligence?  Were they clinically insane?  Or was Jim Jones a highly skilled manipulator of human emotions?  Did he know exactly how to push a human being’s “buttons,” and string them along even to the extent that they would poison their own children before ending their own lives?
Either way, that was just “Jonestown”, right?  It was an isolated event.
Wrong!  “Jonestown” has happened numerous times throughout history – and it will happen again.  I bet you can think of other examples where people were willingly driven to their own demise.  It may not be “Jonestown” – it may go by a different name, but we see the same exact psychological mechanisms of manipulation in play.  Understanding these mechanisms can help immunize you not just to the grosser psychological manipulations of a wicked cult leader, but also to the more subtle psychological conditioning that we all encounter as part of everyday life.

We All Have Basic Human Needs

Jim Jones was a master of deceiving people by appearing to give them what they needed.  And this is the crucial point to grasp.  We all have innate human needs.  If your fundamental psychological needs as a human being are not being adequately met, then, unless you understand precisely what’s happening and respond appropriately, you will be motivated to latch on to any source that appears to satisfy these needs.
Some of your basic human needs include:

• The security of a safe environment in which to grow.
• A sense of autonomy and control of your life.
• A sense of self-worth earned through creative problem solving and the achievement of personal goals.
• Being part of a broader, likeminded community.
• A sense of status within social groupings (which includes feeling important or respected in some way).
• Being emotionally connected to certain people (family, friends, etc.).
• Meaning and purpose arising from being able to make a difference.

Again, if any of these basic needs are not sufficiently met in your life, you will feel inexplicably attracted to anyone or anything that promises to supply what is lacking.  The awareness that this is happening can save you an incredible amount of trouble.
Many of Jim Jones’ devotees were drawn from a pool of disgruntled people who were not leading satisfying lives or meeting their basic needs in healthy ways.  People facing uncertain times or uncertain futures, people with low self-esteem and negative self-images, and so forth.  Jones held out the promise of certainty, social acceptance, community, self-respect, purpose and feelings of security inside his “temple.”  And there must have been some really deep seeded beliefs instilled in these people, because eventually they followed Jones, like some new-age Pied Piper, into oblivion.

Universal Applicability and Susceptibility

It’s rather easy to see that if your needs are not being adequately met in a healthy way, and someone or something comes along that promises to supply all of your needs in one convenient package, then that can seem pretty irresistible.
If you disagree, think about this: On a more conventional level, consider how many people feeling neglected in a marriage have a careless affair with someone because it was “so nice to be listened to, flattered, romanced, etc.”  The very same unconscious propulsion towards an affair like that might drive others into the arms of a cult (or even to buy a timeshare or a new wonder drug!)

Rational Justifications for Irrational Behavior

We all need some level of quality attention and strive to meet that need in various ways, but our thirst for it can blind us to the sleazy aspects of the person (or entity) that’s tempting us.  Our emotional drive is so powerful that it will enlist the help of the conscious mind to invent compelling, logical arguments to support what we feel compelled to do.  Jim Jones’ devotees too would certainly have developed a belief system around the cult, and they wholeheartedly believed that they had rational arguments for sticking with it.
It’s easy to say afterwards, “How could I have been so foolish?”  But extreme incidents like the Jonestown massacre demonstrate just how mind-numbingly powerful the drive to meet our basic human needs is.  They can completely overwhelm clear thinking – just as a person dying of thirst in a desert might desperately put an ice-cold bottle of poison to their lips, if it were offered to them.

Weapons of Influence and Manipulation

Famous social psychologist Robert Cialdini conducted a study of how and why people comply (or buy) in business situations, and identified a set of principles which he called the “weapons of influence.”  Although he was looking at business related events and interactions, his principles apply equally well to unsuitable, manipulative relationships of any kind.  And if you look closely, it’s not hard to see the link between Cialdini’s principles and the basic needs I outlined above.
Cialdini’s weapons of influence:

• Reciprocation – “But they’ve done so much for me!”  When you feel indebted to someone, then the law of reciprocation is influencing you.  Jim Jones constantly reminded his devotees of all he and “The People’s Temple” had done for them – how he had “saved them” and how they “owe” themselves to the “temple.”  If someone constantly reminds you how much they are doing or have done for you, they are being manipulative.  It runs all the way from free samples in product marketing/advertising to someone doing an unrequested favor for you just so they can ask you for a favor in return – the aim is to make you feel obligated to reciprocate.  (Read Influence: Psychology of Persuasion.)
• Commitment and consistency – If people publicly commit verbally or in writing to an idea or goal, they are more likely to honor that commitment.  We like to appear consistent and dependable to both ourselves and others (think of the disapproval heaped upon politicians who change their minds).  To suddenly stop following orders or abandon once-deeply-held beliefs can simply feel impossible to many, even in the face of mounting evidence that disproves the belief.
• Social proof – People will do things they see other people doing.  Period.  “A thousand other people can’t be wrong, right?”  or “If everyone else is doing it then it must be OK.”  This kind of thinking is how people get swayed into being “fashion victims” as well as “cult victims.”  And it’s complicated too, because this is not just thoughtless blindness on our part.  Hundreds of years ago, for human beings to survive in a world of predators, we had to form tight-knit social groups and look to others for behavioral cues.  This is still useful up to a point, but the manipulators of the world can easily use this to their advantage.
• Authority – People will tend to obey authority figures, even if they are asked to perform unjust acts.  Authority figures come in many different flavors and facades (and Jim Jones was certainly naturally authoritative).
• Likability – People are more easily persuaded and manipulated by other people whom they like.  But likable people might not do very likable things and that’s the problem.  Cialdini demonstrated that people tend to buy from people they like, or buy things people they like buy.  We also tend to like attractive people.  It’s no coincidence that cult leaders tend to be charismatic, likeable and attractive.  (Read How to Win Friends and Influence People.)
• Scarcity - If something seems scarce, demand for it will increase.  “Limited time offer” or “while supplies last” or “only for the first 100 buyers” are all ways that the scarcity principle is used in marketing.  In manipulative relationships it may be used like this: “You will never meet anyone else like me!”  It’s subtle, but the implication is that I am rare, and therefore more valuable to you.  Jim Jones phrased it like this: “‘The People’s Temple’ is the only place you can be saved” – all cults will have a similar manipulative slogan.

4 Smart Ways to Protect Yourself

To protect yourself from the more excessive and evil manipulations of organizations and individuals, you need to:

1. Be aware that extreme “promise of gain” and “threat of loss” are basic universal tools for manipulating belief and behavior.
2. Understand that if your basic emotional and physical needs are not adequately met, you become more vulnerable to being manipulated by anyone willing to exploit this gap.  Just understanding this can help immunize you against becoming a victim.
3. Observe how Cialdini’s “weapons of influence” operate in everyday life (often in benign ways) and how they are indirectly linked to basic human needs.
4. Stay calm.  Breathe.  A calm mind can perceive the world much more clearly and objectively.

Afterthoughts

Most people and organizations are not actually out to exploit and manipulate others in an evil way, but as the unfortunate followers of Jim Jones discovered back in 1978, when they do, horrifying things can happen.
So… I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:  Live by choice, not by chance.  Make changes, not excuses.  Be motivated, not manipulated.  Work to excel, not compete.  Choose to listen to your inner voice, not the jumbled opinions of everyone else.
And if you feel like you’re struggling with a manipulative relationship situation of any kind, know that you are not alone.  Many of us are right there with you, working things out for ourselves.  Stand strong!  Stay inspired!  This is precisely why Angel and I wrote our book, “1,000 Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently”.  It’s filled with short, concise tips on how to do just that.
The bottom line is that there are manipulative people in this world that will try to mess with your mind, but you can defend yourself.  It’s about arming yourself with awareness.

The floor is yours…

In what way have people tried to manipulate you?
When and how did you realize this?  What did you do about it?
Please leave a comment below and share your thoughts and insights.

Photo by: Rebecca Finch | Article source

12 Things Happy People Do Differently

“I’d always believed that a life of quality, enjoyment, and wisdom were my human birthright and would be automatically bestowed upon me as time passed.  I never suspected that I would have to learn how to live - that there were specific disciplines and ways of seeing the world I had to master before I could awaken to a simple, happy, uncomplicated life.”
-Dan Millman

Studies conducted by positivity psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky point to 12 things happy people do differently to increase their levels of happiness.  These are things that we can start doing today to feel the effects of more happiness in our lives.  (Check out her book The How of Happiness.)
I want to honor and discuss each of these 12 points, because no matter what part of life’s path we’re currently traveling on, these ‘happiness habits’ will always be applicable.

1. Express gratitude. – When you appreciate what you have, what you have appreciates in value.  Kinda cool right?  So basically, being grateful for the goodness that is already evident in your life will bring you a deeper sense of happiness.  And that’s without having to go out and buy anything.  It makes sense.  We’re gonna have a hard time ever being happy if we aren’t thankful for what we already have.
2. Cultivate optimism. – Winners have the ability to manufacture their own optimism.  No matter what the situation, the successful diva is the chick who will always find a way to put an optimistic spin on it.  She knows failure only as an opportunity to grow and learn a new lesson from life.  People who think optimistically see the world as a place packed with endless opportunities, especially in trying times.
3. Avoid over-thinking and social comparison. – Comparing yourself to someone else can be poisonous.  If we’re somehow ‘better’ than the person that we’re comparing ourselves to, it gives us an unhealthy sense of superiority.  Our ego inflates – KABOOM – our inner Kanye West comes out!  If we’re ‘worse’ than the person that we’re comparing ourselves to, we usually discredit the hard work that we’ve done and dismiss all the progress that we’ve made.  What I’ve found is that the majority of the time this type of social comparison doesn’t stem from a healthy place.  If you feel called to compare yourself to something, compare yourself to an earlier version of yourself.
4. Practice acts of kindness. – Performing an act of kindness releases serotonin in your brain.  (Serotonin is a substance that has TREMENDOUS health benefits, including making us feel more blissful.)  Selflessly helping someone is a super powerful way to feel good inside.  What’s even cooler about this kindness kick is that not only will you feel better, but so will people watching the act of kindness.  How extraordinary is that?  Bystanders will be blessed with a release of serotonin just by watching what’s going on.  A side note is that the job of most anti-depressants is to release more serotonin.  Move over Pfizer, kindness is kicking ass and taking names.
5. Nurture social relationships. – The happiest people on the planet are the ones who have deep, meaningful relationships.  Did you know studies show that people’s mortality rates are DOUBLED when they’re lonely?  WHOA!  There’s a warm fuzzy feeling that comes from having an active circle of good friends who you can share your experiences with.  We feel connected and a part of something more meaningful than our lonesome existence.
6. Develop strategies for coping. – How you respond to the ‘craptastic’ moments is what shapes your character.  Sometimes crap happens – it’s inevitable.  Forrest Gump knows the deal.  It can be hard to come up with creative solutions in the moment when manure is making its way up toward the fan.  It helps to have healthy strategies for coping pre-rehearsed, on-call, and in your arsenal at your disposal.
7. Learn to forgive. – Harboring feelings of hatred is horrible for your well-being.  You see, your mind doesn’t know the difference between past and present emotion.  When you ‘hate’ someone, and you’re continuously thinking about it, those negative emotions are eating away at your immune system.  You put yourself in a state of suckerism (technical term) and it stays with you throughout your day.
8. Increase flow experiences. – Flow is a state in which it feels like time stands still.  It’s when you’re so focused on what you’re doing that you become one with the task.  Action and awareness are merged.  You’re not hungry, sleepy, or emotional.  You’re just completely engaged in the activity that you’re doing.  Nothing is distracting you or competing for your focus.
9. Savor life’s joys. – Deep happiness cannot exist without slowing down to enjoy the joy.  It’s easy in a world of wild stimuli and omnipresent movement to forget to embrace life’s enjoyable experiences.  When we neglect to appreciate, we rob the moment of its magic.  It’s the simple things in life that can be the most rewarding if we remember to fully experience them.
10. Commit to your goals. – Being wholeheartedly dedicated to doing something comes fully-equipped with an ineffable force.  Magical things start happening when we commit ourselves to doing whatever it takes to get somewhere.  When you’re fully committed to doing something, you have no choice but to do that thing.  Counter-intuitively, having no option – where you can’t change your mind – subconsciously makes humans happier because they know part of their purpose.
11. Practice spirituality. – When we practice spirituality or religion, we recognize that life is bigger than us.  We surrender the silly idea that we are the mightiest thing ever.  It enables us to connect to the source of all creation and embrace a connectedness with everything that exists.  Some of the most accomplished people I know feel that they’re here doing work they’re “called to do.”
12. Take care of your body. – Taking care of your body is crucial to being the happiest person you can be.  If you don’t have your physical energy in good shape, then your mental energy (your focus), your emotional energy (your feelings), and your spiritual energy (your purpose) will all be negatively affected.  Did you know that studies conducted on people who were clinically depressed showed that consistent exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft?  Not only that, but here’s the double whammy… Six months later, the people who participated in exercise were less likely to relapse because they had a higher sense of self-accomplishment and self-worth.

Photo by: Aurelio Asiain | Article Source

10 Toxic Habits that Drain Your Energy

It’s time to break the habits that have been holding you back.  Respect yourself enough to let go of the mindsets and routines that have been sucking you dry.

Bear with me for a moment.  You know when you’re driving to an unfamiliar place, blasting the radio while simultaneously watching your GPS spit out directions?  Then you suddenly get to that one part of the route that’s ridiculously confusing, so you lower the volume even though it has no direct impact on the way you read the directions?

That is your life.  The radio noise you need to cut out to concentrate?  That is the needless, energy-sucking noise in your head.

Turning down the radio in the car re-energizes your mind and offers you clarity when you need it most.  You don’t really think about how or why this makes such a huge difference, you just know that it does.

Now it’s time to apply this same principle to all the other noise in your life, starting with the noise in your head.

But how?

The first step is to eliminate toxic, energy-sucking habits that support this noise.  With over ten years of experience as life coaches behind us, here are ten such habits Angel and I have seen thousands of people struggle with, again and again:

1. Pretending like everything is OK when it isn’t. – Do you feel overwhelmed?  Do you feel like giving up?  There’s honestly no shame in it.  You are not a robot; and even if you were, you’d still need to stop for maintenance sometimes.  There’s no shame in admitting to yourself that you feel exhausted, doubtful, and low.  This is a natural part of being human.  The simple fact that you are aware of this means you are able to turn things around.  It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there’s no need to constantly prove that everything is going well.  You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
2. Letting pain from the past devastate the present. – I am stronger because of the hard times, wiser because of my mistakes, and happier because I have known sadness.  The same is true for you.  Every difficult conversation you have had included someone who was teaching you something about yourself.  Every trying situation contains an opportunity for deeper self-reflection and learning.  Every irritant, heartbreak, frustration, disappointment, and fearful moment is a teacher.  Remember, nothing is as bad as it seems.  Nothing.  There’s a benefit and a blessing hidden in the folds of every experience and every outcome.  So don’t you dare give up on today because of the way things looked yesterday.  Don’t even think about it.  Every day is a new day to try again.  (Read The Road Less Traveled.)
3. Believing that your best days are either in front of you or behind you. – You spend your whole life stuck in the labyrinth, thinking about how you’ll escape one day, and how incredible it will be, and imagining that pristine future keeps you going, but you never do it.  You just use the future to escape the present.  This is precisely what keeps so many of us stressed and unhappy.  The flipside is true as well – obsessing about the past.  What you need to accept is that there are only two days in the year that nothing can be done.  One is yesterday and the other is tomorrow.  So today, this moment, is the right time to love, to laugh, to work and to live boldly.  Yes, this moment needs your undivided attention, for this is the only time and place you are truly alive.
4. Trying to hold on to who you were before one of life’s storms. – Hard times are like strong storms that blow against you.  And it’s not just that these storms hold you back from places you might otherwise go.  They also tear away from you all but the essential parts of your ego that cannot be torn, so that afterward you see yourself as you really are, and not merely as you might like to be.  This is a great thing.  It may seem impossible now, but one day you will look back at the storms you have weathered and give a silent thank you.  For many of us, it is the storms of our lives that have given us compassion, kindness, and gentleness that we otherwise may not have known – and that we can now give away to others, because these qualities are inside of us.  (Angel and I discuss this in detail in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
5. Resisting change and growth. – You must consistently check with yourself and ask: “Am I committed to feeling good, or am I committed to growing?”  Because growth does not always feel good, and feeling good does not always provide growth.  Neither is wrong, as long as there is balance.  The important thing is to remember that being uncomfortable is important too, and this discomfort often arrives right on time.  Don’t avoid it – embrace it.  Channel your energy into progress.  All growth begins at the end of your comfort zone.  When you’re feeling uncomfortable, know that the change taking place in your life is a beginning, not an ending.
6. Worrying and worrying and worrying and never taking action. – Worry is the biggest enemy of the present moment.  It does nothing but steal your joy and keep you very busy doing absolutely nothing at all.  It’s like using your imagination to create things you don’t want.  Break this negative habit!  It is far better to be exhausted from effort than to be tired of doing nothing but worrying.  Don’t waste your effort avoiding effort.  Go ahead and get it done.  Today, ask yourself what is really important and then have the courage to build your day around your answer.
7. Sacrificing all of your Self for everyone else. – Don’t sacrifice yourself too much, because if you do, there will be very little left that you can give to anyone, even those you love dearly.  Whenever you feel trapped and it’s difficult to breathe, let me remind you – don’t forget to secure your own oxygen mask first.  Taking care of yourself does not make you selfish; it makes you selfless.  In fact, it’s the truest form of selflessness one can experience.  Only through attentive self-care can you care for others.  In order to truly have a loving, supportive relationship with someone else, you need to learn how to be your own best friend first.  It’s all about falling in love with yourself first and sharing that love with others who appreciate you, rather than looking for love to compensate for a self-love deficit.
8. Taking everything personally. – There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.  And rarely do people do things because of you anyway.  They do things because of them.  So even when it seems personal, it probably isn’t.  Remember this.  And when you find yourself feeling angry, heartbroken, or victimized by the actions of another, see if you can you find within you any seed of softness, some place deep within that understands how much pain that person must be in, how burdened their soul must be, how devastatingly hardened they must be in their heart in order to behave in a way that is surely out of alignment with their own integrity.  (Read The Four Agreements.)
9. Letting negative thoughts get the best of you. – Don’t believe everything you hear – even in your own mind.  Choose to be miserable and you’ll find plenty of reasons to be miserable.  Choose to be happy you’ll find plenty of reasons to be happy.  It is this simple 99% of the time.   Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction.  Break this negative habit.  Talk about your joys, your loves, and your dreams instead.  Be outrageously and unreasonably positive.  Be funny and creative and ridiculous and joyful all at the same time.  It’ll make you feel better.
10. Refusing to let go a little and open up to uncertainty. – True happiness takes courage.  I’m talking the vulnerable, put yourself out there and risk looking like a fool sort of courage.  It’s not easy, to push the limits of your vulnerability, to dig deeper and deeper into the core of who you are as an individual and not only love and accept the imperfect parts of yourself, but also expose them to others.  You’ve got to be willing to break free from the norm, appear uncool and stop caring so much about what everyone thinks.  It’s about taking a stand.  In fact, we’ve ALL got to take the time to slow down, to break away from the crazy pace in life and take a minute to sit and stare at the sky without checking for the next text, watch the sunset without uploading it to Instagram, and just free ourselves to be ourselves.  We’ve got to shelve our egos and say “yes” to the present moment, to love, to opening ourselves up to being hurt beyond hurt again, and above all, to saying “yes” to taking chances.

The floor is yours…

If you can relate to any of these toxic habits, remember, you are not alone.  We all get caught up in our own heads sometimes, doing things that hold us back from our true potential.  The key is awareness – recognizing these habits and changing them.

So, what’s one toxic habit or thinking pattern that sometimes drains your energy?  How do you cope?  Leave a comment below and share your insight with us.

Article source | Photo by: Lauren Rushing

32 Things You May Regret 10 years From Now

Some of us are just existing and not living. Wouldn’t you rather set the world on fire and do something that challenged you, caused you to get up out of bed each morning actually looking forward to the day ahead, do something about that dream you’ve always had, start that business you’ve been talking about for years, or write that book?

We’ve all got something we’d love to do. It would be fantastic to say to your grandchildren, I gave it my best shot, instead of saying ‘I sat in and watched TV a lot and didn’t really do much with my life.
It’s easy to get caught in the trap of doing nothing, which actually drains your energy more than doing something; anything.

Here are 32 Things you may regret 10 years from now

1. Caring what other people might think

2. Doing what you thought would please others

3. Staying in that job you’ve hated for so long

4. Not going after a dream

5. Giving up at the last hurdle

6. Settling for second best

7. Putting others before yourself

8. Sitting on your arse watching TV

9. Not paying attention to the people who really do matter

10. Not taking risks to do something you’ve always wanted to do

11. Thinking that it’s all about the money

12. Not getting over your fears in life

13. Staying in a relationship you knew had ended a long time ago

14. Not taking care of your body

15. Not finding enough time to sit and enjoy the journey

16. Not laughing at yourself enough

17. Not opening your mind to new possibilities

18. Always thinking about the past

19. Chasing money instead of seeking happiness

20. Always thinking ‘mañana, mañana’ – you’ve got to make your own tomorrows

21. Accepting only the love you think you deserve, when you should have set your standards higher

22. Not realising that it’s your own thoughts that create your world

23. Thinking that the world owes you a favour

24. Listening to reason ALL the time, sometimes you’ve got to just follow your heart

25. Not being braver

26. Not trusting yourself enough

27. Not realising that something good comes out of every bad situation

28. Knowing that you chose this life and that it’s up to you to manage it the way YOU would like

29. Letting someone else use you as a way to realise their dreams

30. Allowing yourself to follow someone else’s beliefs instead of investigating your beliefs for yourself

31. Not being honest ALL THE TIME with yourself and with others

32. Not letting the small things go, and focus on the things that really matter

What about you, is there anything you would add to this list? leave a comment below with your thoughts

 Article source

How to Take Control of What Is Controlling You

What would you think of someone who really wanted to play mind games so that he could covertly influence people to do what he wanted them to do? To most people, it sounds at least a little sleazy and more than a little selfish.

Now what if I add that the person in question is living under an authoritarian regime? And that it's a woman who might have to depend on her skills in covert influence to sustain her life, freedom and ties to her family. How do you feel about the mind games now?

As an NLP (neurolinguistic programming) trainer, I work with lots of clients who arrive wanting to play mind games. Some of them frame it in the socially acceptable language of therapy and coaching: they want to "motivate" or "help" other people. Others frame it in the language of sales, "I want to sell more" or "I want to close more deals." And some call us on the phone and ask, "Will this help me get girls?" We are probably the only training that is sought in equal measure by people who want to pick up dates and by people serious about helping others overcome trauma, anxiety or other obstacles to well-being.

We can help all of these people, although often not in precisely the way they expected when they googled NLP for the first time. People with power and experience find that NLP calls on them to check in with their assumptions, their demons, and the voices in their head. To heighten their influence over others, they need first to become more aware of the way their own experience is shaping their ability to read people, to make choices, and to assign meaning to what happens in their lives. People who hunger for enough influence to survive or feel better often find they need to become more conscious of the relationship between what they observe in others and what they want congruently for themselves and from themselves.

What is controlling you is outside of your control, but it is not outside your influence. Whether you are limited by the rules of powerful authorities or by the criticism of voices in your head, you cannot break free. You need to wriggle free: to move in small increments until you achieve the momentum and mobility you want. In NLP, we call these increments "shifts," the small changes that indicate that significant change is on the way. When you make a shift in yourself, you alter your state or your mindset to gather new information and make different choices. When you get someone else to shift, you build an agreement that motivates and moves.
Shifts happen when you begin to notice two things:

1. what information is available that you're not using yet?
2. when have you experienced the thing you want in another form or context?

People train with us because we give them the tools to make shift happen. We don't promise that they will control anyone's mind (not even their own) but we do offer a better measure of control over the choices they make and the impact they have. Some of them learn to loosen the grip that their past has on their future. Others learn that they have more influence than they thought over what other people notice or choose to do.

All of them choose training because it gives them access to the trainers' belief that they will find what they need to have more control and the trainers' perception of where shifts are possible. The trainers point the way to shift and the students make shift happen.

When you control your ability to shift, you find that you influence others without mind games and that you look forward more often than you look back. It's not a control game: it's a game played for control of your own well-being and the impact you will have on others.

Linda Ferguson, Ph.D. is a senior partner at NLP Canada Training Inc. in Toronto, Canada. She and her team train clients to take more control over their lives and influence. Clients experience rapid, sustainable change and long-term learning about how their thinking drives success.. Read more from Linda at http://www.nlpcanada.com or http://www.nlpcanadatraining.blogspot.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8754707

If Winning Was Not An Inside Affair, The Genie Would Be Real Now

Well, I have read the Arabian Nights stories so many times, it could be amazing. But who has thought of this, in this vein: Sure, all legends and tall tales are based on some sort of reality, truth and honesty, but, not like we think, or it may take some abstract realization to understand how these legends and tall tales are based in reality. With that seemingly convoluted beginning, I begin this article. Sure, when things get seemingly hard to achieve, we naturally want "unbelievable" short cuts at times, such as a genie or a universally powerful and controllable butler to do it for us in an "easy" way that requires a little less effort, or at least an "open sesame" password to open opportunities like Ali Baba had as his "short cut". My point is, to genuinely get these type of advantages, we must look at reality differently, and between the lines of reality to get genuine advantages that really do work. We cannot escape into fantasy or wish for advantages to just come out of "nowhere".

Even real magic and real wishing takes real effort, yet it is simpler than finding a genie or finding the password to it all. Let me explain what I mean:

First, you must know your goal genuinely. (That is key, to know genuinely why. That in itself is more important than how or when.)

Second, you must be steadfast in wanting it. (When you really want it, whatever it takes, that is when it comes the best. Not necessarily the easiest, but the best.)

Third, adjust course and consult your intuition until you get it and even after for the best way to use it. (This is the seemingly hard part, because you must use what is inside of you to genuinely know what to do, why to do it and when to do it at all times for it all to work genuinely.)
Sure, those three steps are simple and powerful, and easy, the more you really want the goal. But, I have to warn you: Those steps are really hard when you do not really want the goal. But when you do, they are easy to enact in every way.

I do not know, call this article one of those things as close as you are going to get to getting a genie or an "open sesame" password. But, when you want it, you can get it. This message is not original to me, but it just has what is real to me in it and from it. Note: I said"call this article one of those things as close as you are going to get to getting a genie or an "open sesame" password. But, when you want it, you can get it." So many show and know this reality in different ways, some explicit and transparent, some not. But, know this, if you take this article and all articles and books like this seriously, you will discover a principle that varies in terms, but not in the way worked out by all who work it and for all who work it, it could be greatness producing. But for those who are uncertain, this is the hardest thing in existence. Be certain, and the miracle principle is your genie, is your password and will work for you ideally, with perfect brilliance. All you need is certainty within yourself.

My name is Joshua Clayton, I am a freelance writer based in Inglewood, California. I also write under a few pen-names and aliases, but Joshua Clayton is my real name, and I write by that for the most part now. I am a philosophical writer and objective thinker and honest action taker. I also work at a senior center in Gardena, California as my day job, among other things, but primarily I am a writer.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8758163

Tony Robbins - The Keys To Massive Success

Be Kind To Yourself - 10 Tips To Stay Sharp

We all hit those low energy periods from time to time. It might be because there is a sustained period of pressure at work, it might be because of stress at work or at home, it just might be because it has been a while since we took some time off. It could be too much business travel, long hours, hotel beds and restaurant meals. Whatever the reason, we all need to recharge the batteries from time to time.

Conventional wisdom says that we cannot be at our most productive when we are tired and stressed, so we need to find ways to look after ourselves in order to be productive. That requires taking care of both body and mind.

Here are 10 tips for you to ponder:

1. Plan your vacation time. Don't wait till the end of your year and cram in some time off. Try to take at least one longer vacation, a week or ten days at minimum. "A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking." Earl Wilson


2. Know what works for you to relax... sitting on a beach is heaven for some, torture for others! Some people need to climb mountains, run marathons or get in a boxing ring!


3. Take mini breaks through the year... doing the things that make you feel good. A few long weekends sprinkled through the year, the occasional day off to do something for you.


4. Have interests outside of work. It should be personalized and does not have to be all consuming, just something that you can focus on other than work.


5. Look after your health. Try to be moderate in your drinking and eating, and find time to work out. "The greatest wealth is health." Virgil


6. Make time in the day when you can think, rather than do.


7. Develop great time management skills... to help reduce your stress.


8. Laugh, it is nature's medicine! "Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy." Thich Nhat Hanh


9. Invest in friendships.


10. Set goals. Having a sense of where you are going is far less stressful than going with the flow.

None of us live in a perfect world, and perhaps at this point in your life some of these things are not possible. Do what you can do to keep your energy levels up and don't beat yourself up about things you can't control.

Kevin Dee is CEO of Eagle, one of Canada's largest professional staffing companies. You can read more of his writing at the Eagle Blog http://www.eagleonline.com/blog/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8779313

What's in Your Memory Bank Account?

Best-selling author Barbara Berger (with Tim Ray) wrote in her book, The Awakening Human Being: A Guide to the Power of Mind, about the Law of Thoughts Arising. Right off, she's given you a big clue: It's a universal law that thoughts will arise. "Thoughts arise and disappear. This is the first law because it describes an impersonal universal phenomenon which is true for everyone. No one knows why or where thoughts come from or what a thought is, but everyone has thoughts. This is the nature of life on this plane."

Berger goes on to explain that when thoughts arise, it isn't because we're doing anything wrong; thoughts come and go on their own. Isn't that the truth! Have you ever had a song or theme music start playing in your mind for, apparently, no reason? Where did the trigger thought for that music come from, why did it happen, and why that song or tune? And, how long does it take for you to get that recording to stop playing over and over in your mind?

Part of my daily morning practice includes reading the day's message from Ernest Holmes' book, The Science of Mind. I'd already decided what my article would be about this week, but was pleased to receive support through this reading. Holmes stated that everything that has ever happened or will happen leaves an imprint on "the walls of time; and could we walk down their corridors and read the writings," we'd read the history. He likened this to how we can record voices and images, store them away safely, and revisit them, even decades later and still hear or view them. Well, this is exactly what we do: walk the corridors of our memories. And it's not just our personal history involved; it's also our physical, mental, and emotional genetic history.

That's what those pesky negative thoughts are about: Our feelings and mental images, based on our perspectives and interpretations, imprint on our memory cells, like pages printed for books on shelves or paintings created and hung on the walls. Plus, there are genetic imprints on our cells as well. A thought arises and the next thing we know, we're traveling down the corridors of our personal hall of records.

A negative-thought replay was going on for me, and this new thought came to me: Pebbles, Stones, Rocks, Boulders. I carry a lot of positive memories, which I do choose to replay from time to time. But isn't it interesting that positive replays tend to occur more when we deliberately seek them out, rather than arise spontaneously. Negative-thought replays seem to arise far more spontaneously, but maybe that's not really true. Maybe we have them closer to the surface than we realize. Maybe our practice is to go down negative-thought corridors, and we don't realize this is our practice. It happens so fast, who has time to notice why it's happening? And, after all, it's what most people do, isn't it? We call it being logical, or say it's justified. We've made this practice almost a law, by virtue of so many of us doing it so regularly, as though it's the only way to go.

I spoke with someone who's trying to resolve a particular situation. The next steps are obvious, and we discussed them. Yet, every step discussed was met with a comment from the person about why it can't be done or what's impossible. I finally said, "Maybe you need to stop pulling up all the negatives you can imagine. You need to make a decision. The first decision is to get more information, because you're deciding what can't be done rather than discovering what can be done." She agreed that was what she was doing. If all you focus on is what can't be done, how or when the heck will you focus on what might or can be done? Which one will get you to an improved and preferred circumstance first?

Our memories are like bank accounts. You'll find highs and lows there; and where you are with them fluctuates--because thoughts arise. But you can deliberately create more positives that get imprinted and stored in your memory bank account. You can also deliberately--or by default--continue to subtract from it by focusing on negatives. That's what my Pebbles, Stones, Rocks, Boulders thought brought to my attention. I thought about how sometimes we get a pebble in our shoe. Maybe we stop and take it out; maybe we keep walking on it, complaining the whole time to ourselves or someone else.

Stones, rocks, and boulders, of course, won't fit into our shoe; and if they did, we'd certainly stop and get them out right away. But when they are thoughts, which are already memories or become memories as we think them, we'll put them into our shoe ourselves, repeatedly. When such thoughts come up, I've started saying to myself, "Pebbles, stones, rocks, boulders."

I don't need to figure out which category my negative thought fits into; that's just walking the same path with something in my shoe that doesn't benefit me. Saying those four words gets my attention on what I'm doing to myself--and that I can stop doing it. I can treat even the bigger ones like pebbles and remove them from my shoe then get on with creating something positive and feeling appreciation for the good stuff and people in my life, as well as the positive possibilities.

Thoughts arise. You maybe can't break or change the law of this, but you can decide what to do from there. You can decide whether you'll visit your memory bank account and count your negatives or your positives, as well as decide which one you'll put more of into your account. What you put in and what you take out of your memory account is always up to you, and will reflect the inner life you experience, which then influences the outer life you live. You can choose to make your memory bank account work against you or for you. Choose for you. It's a good practice, one you'll appreciate.
Practice makes progress.

Joyce L Shafer is a Life Empowerment Coach dedicated to helping people feel, be, and live their true inner power. She's author of "I Don't Want to be Your Guru" and other books/ebooks, and publishes a free weekly online newsletter that offers empowering articles. See all that's offered by Joyce and on her site at http://stateofappreciation.weebly.com/guest-articles.html#.UPGKUB3BGSo

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/8781221